Labels: Simple, underthought descriptions of complex people
Most girls grow up dreaming of a fairytale wedding with their perfect prince charming and my childhood was no different. My dad always looked out for my sister and I and taught my brother to be very protective. I learned the right guys from the wrong just by the things my dad would say.
Once I hit Junior High the boy idea started to roll in and I had various "guy friends" who were happy to be "more than a friend". For me, a boyfriend was the guy who carried your books home from school and called you at night. That was the typical Junior High boyfriend and I was happy with that. I pretty much dated the same guy off and on throughout Junior High. He walked me to and from school everyday. That was all him and I needed and we were perfectly happy with that. When we reached High School I decided it was time to end our little charade. I wasn't ready for a mature "High School" relationship so to speak. It seemed like a wise decision.
Once I hit Junior High the boy idea started to roll in and I had various "guy friends" who were happy to be "more than a friend". For me, a boyfriend was the guy who carried your books home from school and called you at night. That was the typical Junior High boyfriend and I was happy with that. I pretty much dated the same guy off and on throughout Junior High. He walked me to and from school everyday. That was all him and I needed and we were perfectly happy with that. When we reached High School I decided it was time to end our little charade. I wasn't ready for a mature "High School" relationship so to speak. It seemed like a wise decision.
I grew up in an amazing church and when I got to High School I had some amazing youth sponsors who taught me a lot about relationships and what they should and shouldn't be. Being from a small town was tough for a lot of people and often kids would get bored and do things they later regretted. This made my decision to abstain from a High School relationship all too easy.
This wasn't some decision made purely on the "sex talk" or even the fact that we didn't have a lot of good choices when it came to guys. I was always taught that relationships were what you had before marriage and that when you begin to date you begin to look for your future husband. In my town, it was clear that I would not marry anyone I dated. I'd seen it a thousand times. People date all throughout high school and then break-up and go to college. I knew I wouldn't be one of those girls who stuck around for ever and married their high school sweetheart. There's nothing wrong with those who do, it's just not me. I might be a small town girl, but I needed to spread my wings and explore something more than what my town had to offer. Why would I push myself into a relationship that wasn't meant to last? Would I be heart broken? The idea seemed ridiculously simple....so I went for it.
Then I hit college and realized that the maturity level of college boys was no different than high school.......in fact, some of them seemed less mature. College boys were just high school boys who had more homework and could buy their own alcohol.....NOT my cup of tea.
Everyone calls me a feminist because I am strong willed and believe that I can do most things myself........let's face it, I can! This is not because I am a feminist. This is because I grew up with a mother who could do it all and a father who believed in my mother's abilities. In my house, the laundry, cooking, and yardwork were split 50/50. My parents alternated who cooked each night and they took turns driving me to gymnastics, softball practice, and school events, and divided the housework. They were a team 100%. I grew up watching this partnership and wanted it for myself. My mom was the one who taught me how to check the oil in my car and how to change a tire, and my dad showed me how to use electronics and how to mow the lawn. I've learned various skills from both parents and I can take apart my bed, fix the toilet tank system, hang pretty much anything, mow and weedeat the lawn, cook and bake, hook up my tv and dvd player/vcr/game system, install a printer on my computer, change a lightbulb, and many other various tasks.
So, yes, I might be a feminist because -No, I do not rely on boys to take care of everything for me. I am perfectly capable, not because I don't like men, but because my parents taught me how to be independent and take care of myself. Anytime something broke and dad wasn't home to fix it, my mom went to work. She was never nervous about the task presented and was great at figuring out most anything. I know that for most things I can call home and ask either one of my parents and get the answer that I need. I am independent and strong-willed because I was raised to be.
Last weekend I was called some hurtful names because of my being a "feminist". I was really upset about it because I wasn't calling myself a feminist, someone gave me that label and I was told to "Own it because I was called it." So here, I am proud to say that I am in fact a feminist. I believe that I can do most anything that a man can do. Sure, I can't rewire the electricity in my house or run new plumbing, but neither can a man who isn't trained specifically to do those things. I've never bashed a man for the things he can or can't do and I'm not pro-women and against men. I am simply pro-women.
I've watched many of my friends go through heartbreak after heartbreak and I've seen some awful men, but I've also seen some very great men. I am not opposed to a relationship, but I do have high standards. I'm sure my list is no different than the list of any other girl. A girl with standards just means that she values herself.....would you really want someone who doesn't value themself?
So as far as hurtful names? Call me what you want. I'll own it if it will satisfy you. My concern was never to please everyone. It was simply to live a happy and fulfilling life. Sure, I'm uptight and a little neurotic even. That's just who I am.
This wasn't some decision made purely on the "sex talk" or even the fact that we didn't have a lot of good choices when it came to guys. I was always taught that relationships were what you had before marriage and that when you begin to date you begin to look for your future husband. In my town, it was clear that I would not marry anyone I dated. I'd seen it a thousand times. People date all throughout high school and then break-up and go to college. I knew I wouldn't be one of those girls who stuck around for ever and married their high school sweetheart. There's nothing wrong with those who do, it's just not me. I might be a small town girl, but I needed to spread my wings and explore something more than what my town had to offer. Why would I push myself into a relationship that wasn't meant to last? Would I be heart broken? The idea seemed ridiculously simple....so I went for it.
Then I hit college and realized that the maturity level of college boys was no different than high school.......in fact, some of them seemed less mature. College boys were just high school boys who had more homework and could buy their own alcohol.....NOT my cup of tea.
Everyone calls me a feminist because I am strong willed and believe that I can do most things myself........let's face it, I can! This is not because I am a feminist. This is because I grew up with a mother who could do it all and a father who believed in my mother's abilities. In my house, the laundry, cooking, and yardwork were split 50/50. My parents alternated who cooked each night and they took turns driving me to gymnastics, softball practice, and school events, and divided the housework. They were a team 100%. I grew up watching this partnership and wanted it for myself. My mom was the one who taught me how to check the oil in my car and how to change a tire, and my dad showed me how to use electronics and how to mow the lawn. I've learned various skills from both parents and I can take apart my bed, fix the toilet tank system, hang pretty much anything, mow and weedeat the lawn, cook and bake, hook up my tv and dvd player/vcr/game system, install a printer on my computer, change a lightbulb, and many other various tasks.
So, yes, I might be a feminist because -No, I do not rely on boys to take care of everything for me. I am perfectly capable, not because I don't like men, but because my parents taught me how to be independent and take care of myself. Anytime something broke and dad wasn't home to fix it, my mom went to work. She was never nervous about the task presented and was great at figuring out most anything. I know that for most things I can call home and ask either one of my parents and get the answer that I need. I am independent and strong-willed because I was raised to be.
Last weekend I was called some hurtful names because of my being a "feminist". I was really upset about it because I wasn't calling myself a feminist, someone gave me that label and I was told to "Own it because I was called it." So here, I am proud to say that I am in fact a feminist. I believe that I can do most anything that a man can do. Sure, I can't rewire the electricity in my house or run new plumbing, but neither can a man who isn't trained specifically to do those things. I've never bashed a man for the things he can or can't do and I'm not pro-women and against men. I am simply pro-women.
I've watched many of my friends go through heartbreak after heartbreak and I've seen some awful men, but I've also seen some very great men. I am not opposed to a relationship, but I do have high standards. I'm sure my list is no different than the list of any other girl. A girl with standards just means that she values herself.....would you really want someone who doesn't value themself?
So as far as hurtful names? Call me what you want. I'll own it if it will satisfy you. My concern was never to please everyone. It was simply to live a happy and fulfilling life. Sure, I'm uptight and a little neurotic even. That's just who I am.
May I introduce Alyssa Krystine Cline
I
like a clean house, I put education before boys, I like to sew, I write music, sometimes I turn my
phone off to listen to music, I don't really like to drink, I hate hot
weather, and........................ I'm a feminist. (:
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